Am I Ready?

9:54 PM 12 Comments A+ a-

Something has changed within me
Something is not the same
I'm through with playing by the rules
Of someone else's game
Too late for second-guessing
Too late to go back to sleep
It's time to trust my instincts
Close my eyes... and leap!

It's time to try
Defying gravity
I think I'll try
Defying gravity
Kiss me goodbye
I am defying gravity
And you wont bring me down!
( Defying Gravity - Glee Cast)


For a recent days, I think I had forgot that I had apply on scholarship. I forget to practice my academic English and tend to practice my general English through reading blog and reading some novels. I had my self busy with  my online shop transaction for weeks.

Now when everything slows down, I remember about my goal : to continue study and to improve my career development. It is my big resolution in 2015.  I know it is  a hard decision to do if it is come true. I had to left my babies (2 yo and 7 mo) by the end of Aug 2015. I had to left my current job that means I have no salary for two years. Knowing that I used to have my own salary since I graduated in 2009 and ever so I never live outside my homeland before. For me it is must be difficult to stay out from the country alone, without any salary. I really going to leave my comfort zone.

 At this moment I am waiting for interview stage of my scholar application. The committee will inform me at least on Feb 25th. Wish me luck!

Some people say study abroad for only one year will make you have no time for home sick. You will busy for study, make friends with international colleague, finish your thesis and enjoy the beautiful of UK  (if I am lucky enough, I will see the beauty of Europe). I hope so. I will try my best if I had a chance to study in UK.


source

Out of my now comfort zone had been my consideration for a long time. But I guess it is right time for my career. I am still young and I need to learn more to develop my career. I have leave my babies everyday to do routine job ( the unnecessary job) compare to the core of my institution is in monetary and banking industry.  All my sacrifice in family time just for small retiring allowance, irritating career development ( yes, I am nobody in here and a diploma graduate like me is hard to be develop they said or maybe they just think develop me will put their career in danger, who knows?).

 I do not want my children ask me someday why I do not try my best when I was young? I do not want they find out that their mother wasted her time, youth, and skill moreover your mother is hired to built other people dream. I really do not want to hear their question regarding why you put your dream high but no extra effort? I do not think the possibilities that my children will grow up and never ask that critical question like that. Why? Because deep in my heart I ask the same question too my mother. Quoting the famous novel Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close :

Parents are always more knowledgeable than their children, and children are always smarter than their parents.― Jonathan Safran Foer, Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close

Here I am try to answer the future question of my children! I am ready for the challenge :)

12 comments

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Hey Rita
AUTHOR
January 30, 2015 at 2:19 AM delete

That is so brave of you! I wish you all the best in this next chapter of your life :) Best of luck and may all your wishes come true xx

Rita
heyrita.co.uk

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February 1, 2015 at 10:31 AM delete

Just discovered your wonderful blog after you left a comment on mine. Good luck with your future, I hope everything works out for you! x
Following you on GFC & Bloglovin.

http://ditsysprinkles.blogspot.co.uk
xoxo

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Unknown
AUTHOR
February 1, 2015 at 6:18 PM delete

Thank you Rita.. Wish me luck :)

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Unknown
AUTHOR
February 1, 2015 at 6:19 PM delete

Thank you Ditsy, your blog is wonderful too. Wish me luck :)

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Shaira Manalo
AUTHOR
February 2, 2015 at 2:19 AM delete

Good luck on your future endeavors. It's always about taking risks. I wish you luck and all the best! I know you can do it! :)

I'm now following you on bloglovin. Hope you'll do the same :)

Looking forward to see more of your posts!
Have a nice day! :)

xoxo,
SHAIRA
http://www.missdream-girl.blogspot.com

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Unknown
AUTHOR
February 2, 2015 at 5:28 PM delete

Thank you Shaira for your support! wish me luck :) I already follow you too

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SARA MEIRELES
AUTHOR
February 6, 2015 at 8:09 AM delete

WOW amazing post . The poem is so beautiful and motivational .
I really like

KISS
NEW POST http://sarameirelesthesnowwhite.blogspot.pt/2015/02/red-lips.html#more

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Unknown
AUTHOR
February 8, 2015 at 4:04 PM delete

Good luck! I might also be going abroad to study. Waiting for my results that should be coming out in the next 2 months :)

LuxBunni

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Kate
AUTHOR
February 13, 2015 at 12:08 PM delete

Wow, I so admire you for taking this leap! I wish you all the best and hope you achieve all your goals. x

Kate Louise Blogs

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Unknown
AUTHOR
February 17, 2015 at 7:31 PM delete

Good luck Bunni! I hope you have a great result

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Unknown
AUTHOR
February 17, 2015 at 7:56 PM delete

Thank you Kate, I really wish for the best :)

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